4299 - Stronger

Another tasty treat for tea - chicken
Drumsticks - four - not had chicken for so long
With it, peas, carrot, mushrooms, shovelled in
And the rest of the basil all thrown on
It was a veritable food mountain
I've done amazingly, stamina-wise
Considering I woke at five this morning
It's nearly ten now, I've got tired eyes
But feel full of energy otherwise
Bought groovy new red Kappa boots going
Home, Sports Direct, 30 quid, a song
Then played more songs on the uke. Half-arsed tries
At singing along while I'm practising
But I'll develop that skill before long...

4298 - Brooding as I'm fooding

Wow, what a tea - salmon, peas and chick peas
Mushrooms, fried egg, quinoa, leaves of basil
That should make me feel good and at my ease
Felt strong today, whereas lately been ill
Stressed out and smoking, drinking, so unwell
Even felt a faint twinge around the heart
Those last few days, and before that, bowel
Dysfunction. But as soon as I once thought
I'll give up, the pressure left me, the start
Of mental health was immediate. And this
Very evening been reading alcohol-
Related articles about the sort
Of damage it can do to pancreas
And elsewhere. And really it's all mental...

4297 - Enough is enough

Guess what - I've decided to give it up!
That's booze, and with it, fags, and that lifestyle
I've done it before, it's time to step up
Save money, but above all, get my smile
Back, get my heart healthier, bowels and all
Exercise again, when injuries heal
From falling on that busy road when full
Of beer, and nearly getting myself killed
I'll feel better if it loses appeal
And people associated with a sup
Can do their shit without me now a while
At least, we'll see, depends upon my will
Power. Enjoyed sea bass, basil leaves on top
Mushrooms, peas, chick peas. feeling nicely full

4296 - Sunny Salford scenes

Another sunshine walk enjoyed today
Got no money, can't do much else right now
Decided again to go Salford way
To find Buile Hill Park. You just have to go
Beyond Shopping City. Langworthy Road
(Of former notoriety) rises
Up a slight hill towards Eccles Old Road
I went too far, wasn't sure where it was
Then found it, thanks to maps in bus shelters
Some sunbathers but I did not obey
That impulse. It wasn't strong anyhow
Not sure I'm young enough still to impress
Anyone with my uncovered body
I didn't feel I should put it on show!

4295 - Lemon invest

Went for a walk in the Salford sunshine
To somewhere I like now, Shopping City
Some good shops, only takes half an hour's time
To get there, and guess what - there's an Aldi
There's a big Tesco too, and a healthy
Holland and Barrett store - quite surprising
Tomato, garlic and herb dried chickpeas
Are a new thing. In Aldi, was buying
Fresh herbs, I need to quickly start eating
Them before they go off. Not quite a crime
But while there, bought limoncello, it's the
Italian lemon liqueur, and drinking
It all, I then bought Stella - had a fine
Binge, forgot natch to write this diary

4294 - Madrid Madness

That was some game, Ramos took out Salah
He then elbowed Liverpool's goalkeeper
Who then threw it at a Madrid player
Who kicked it in the open net, oh dear
Then he spooned a Bale long range shot in the
Net, giving Madrid two free goals - oh no!
Karius the devil, forgiveness not near
He made up for failure of Ronaldo
And handed it to the whites. But, o-ho!
What a goal from Bale, could be best ever
An overhead kick, perfect endeavour
So a great game, talking points that won't go
Anytime soon, something to remember
That goal made all footballing fans just purr

4293 - Uke - a decay

Played Rainbow, King Crimson, Misunderstood
On the uke, then ate tea, reduced price shit
Tikka masala, wish I'd not bothered
Now writing this while watching the concert
From Perth, or Belfast. First, Courtney Barnett
Then Father John Misty (yawn), the Breeders
(Better), but turned it over now - don't let
Me see the boring Manic Street Sweepers
They're without the leaping guy who plays bass
And does the interviews. Now it's that dud
Group, Public Service Broadcasting. I caught
Them, I think, with N, supporting The Bloss-
oms, or maybe the Super Furries. Good,
That's this done, now a drink to kill the night

4292 - Psychic dance flat

A hot sticky day, hot evening playing
The uke once more, it's my main joy right now
I can play most anything, rehearsing
Not necessary, and that is just how
I've always dreamed it should be, effort low
Enjoyment high, a form of cool magic
Which I can enjoy, and which still allows
Others enjoyment, a seeming psychic
Connection to their souls through live music
Fought off the habitual reflex to drink
Booze out of boredom when playing was through
Now listening to Fat White Family pick
Through the debris, a mainly low-fi thing
On Vit B1 and Marmite til France, now

4291 - Nothing but blue skies

Another sunny day, wasted inside
Hopefully, when bank holiday comes, then
I'll get outside, find somewhere to get fried
And work on comedy ideas again
Practice the uke, to new music listen
See family, read, relax, and go walking
Above all, try to minimise my spend
As I'm overdrawn. I've not been spending
That much really, it's just I've been paying
Hundreds for the French trip this month. I tried
To pay by credit card, but the bank men
Said no. Restrictions on cash transferring
But I've not spent my rent, that's put aside
And will be used in mortgage reduction

4290 - Comedy saloon

Early start, just as well, the day was filled
With a long litigation talk, hi-jacked
By folks who should know better than to kill
The presentation's flow with endless chat
About their own work. Couldn't interrupt
Them, what can you do? Just make enemies
And be criticised, so the rest just sat
Twiddling thumbs, deciding on recipes
Or thinking bout forthcoming holidays
Sat near Helen, who I saw with a smile
In the pub tonight with her current chap
That was I think embarrassing, but he's
All right, or so it seemed. They had no will
Though to see me do my comedy act

4289 - Yes uke can

Early start, early finish, that's tonight
Got home early, drank three bottles of beer
While playing uke with all my bleedin' might
I must say it's becoming easier
Now I'm feeling mellow, relaxed, the cure
Has taken effect, I've wee'd it all out
I've eaten, showered, what's left for me here
Nothing except chilling and feeling proud
Naturally tired, no need now to be loud
Ready for bed, ambitions now are slight
Still only ten past nine, the clock appears
To say, this makes sense, feeling like the crowd
Learning that getting pissed must be done right
If you're working next day, sleep, get head clear

4288 - Paper sun

Another sunny day, but I've just seen
A weather forecast for tomorrow - rain!
Oh no, although we don't want droughts - that's been
Known, like back in '76 - again
After some reading of the Guardian
And a uke session, Bart is back from trip
To Poland, where he caught an infection
He seems OK now, antibiotics
Have lessened his sore throat, which would have stripped
Him of his speaking role on telephone
Call centre work, back tomorrow, a pain
As it is, without speech problems! My script
For today is a cool chat with Lou, been
Sitting in Piccadilly Gardens, man!

4287 - Love and carnage

A lovely sunny day in May, okay?
Walked round the town with Josephine, all right?
Had lovely lasagne at Dom's and J
Had a canny cannelloni - I tried
It after she couldn't finish her bite
We also bought two bags of Twirl pieces
Sat in the sun near the cathedral, quite
Nice it was. Earlier, saw start of Harry's
Wedding to Meghan, the celebrities
And royals enjoying the sunny day
In and around Windsor, crowded roadside
Flag waving, smiling, makes us feel at peace
Even though historically, it's the way
We unite when there's a war we must fight

4286 - Sunny delight

Doing it the morning after, now what
Happened yesterday? Let's try to recall
Nice day, good meeting, constructive, and lot
Of good vibes. Good to see Zoe, was full
Of good ideas and comment, Kerry all
Tanned from the North East sun, and Diane too
Then met N for one of those typical
Wacky nights out she finds, young actors who
Were doing some really good things. Her news
Is that she's got a place on their course. Spot
On! She'll get a loan too, repayable
Only if she earns a lot, but her view
Is she won't, she'll travel and teach, then out
Of the blue, choose where to at last settle

4285 - Fuck you

Hey you, whatever you may think, it's not
That, it's more, you will never know it all
I realise now that it is all bullshit
Don't make me laugh, in any logical
Sense, you can fuck off, I am above, will
Triumph, so take your shit and shove it far
Up your arse, be with your fool, meanwhile I'll
Progress in ways you can't deal, you are poor
I am sorry for you, but I'm aware
Why should I care, you struggle with life's shit
Yet you dismiss me, showing fascist real
Existence, like everyone else, who cares
Boring, yawn, stuff it up your jumper, hot
You may be, but you're just so typical

4284 - Pay, pay, pay what you want

Another busy evening, positive
My speaker wire works again, now it's out
Of the wall, expanded once more to give
A decent stereo sound. Yippee! No doubt
Though, the biggest plus has to be about
Ringing Bank of Scotland, my mortgage bank
And making arrangements to throw amounts
Of extra dosh from now on at it. Thank
God it was easy, didn't draw a blank
My rental income will really relieve
The amount I pay each month if I put
It all in, no point it being in my bank
No interest on savings, so I will heave
It all at reducing my mortgage debt

4283 - I need good neighbours

What a long day and evening, now past ten
Spent half the evening sorting out the course
In France next month, but it is now all done
Just need to check in, last 24 hours
Before the flight, Manchester to Toulouse
Also played some uke, then one speaker failed
The wire had got stuck in the wall. To lose
My stereo sound makes me wanna wail
I may have to use headphones for a while
The neighbours may prefer it quieter than
It has been until now. That prick upstairs
Seems to be moving out, and a couple
Moving in. Had some tasty white fish - yum!
An early night feels right - my aching eyes!

4282 - The red hot plastic chilli peppers

I've had the last of those awful cheap meals
I bought some myself from the reduced shelf
In Sainsbury's, and Bart left some but he'll
Be in Poland a few days, so myself
Has unfortunately, for my own health
Eaten them, probably along with the
Cheap plastic covers they're cooked in that melts
All over the place, toxic shite for sure
Additives, than you can shake stick at, more
I'm hungry again after what was styled
'Chilli and rice' a radioactive elf
Might have enjoyed, though tastebudswise, a bore
I'll never have that shit again, I feel
Bought some bread, that with Marmite I shall wolf...

4281 - Stick it up yer jumper, baby

I felt pretty bad, thought I'd need a rest
In the late morning, kept putting off that
All-important rehearsal chore, but blessed
With talent and already knowing it
From previous weeks trying out this shit
I went over my material in
The late afternoon, and it proved a hit
One of those gigs when you feel good and then
The five minutes just goes, you're having fun
So I got flashed, out of time, with the best
Stuff not yet done, but although I had bought
A happy hour, cheap priced bottle of wine
I got a second spot late on to test
Out the rest of it, and it rocked - pow, splat!

4280 - We are bad

I'm sorry, but Eurovision just showed
That Britain isn't liked, so maybe we
Should look at ourselves and try to be more
Internationalist, though it's really
Hard to understand how Israel can be
Voted for, it's not fair or right, but the
Entry by them was good, not that catchy
But clearly there's a problem and that's we
Have a long way to go to be happy
I think this shows that the UK is showed
As not popular, right or wrong, but we
Are victimised, as we victimised the
Other countries. No matter how we show
They quite rightly remember our hubris

4279 - In the refuge

I slept well, felt ok, in good spirits
But at the same time, felt I didn't fit
After work, a few drinks with P, and it's
The first time in the Refuge, got to sit
On the comfy leather sofas, and hit
On the matters that count. normal subjects
Restoring the balance, sanity bit
Never mind what some others may object
Or justify their ways, try to connect
With how it is, if they behave like tits
They have to live with that and deal with it
As long as I know that I was correct
I can and have moved on through mental blitz
I shouldn't care about all that bullshit

4278 - In a spin cycle

My thought processes are at barely half-speed
I just can't concentrate on anything
I feel dyslexic when I try to read
And can barely be bothered performing
In the Comedy Marathon coming
Up this Sunday, should be a big day but
It's not, because right now it means nothing
However, tomorrow night, going out
So it's important I rehearse tonight
Despite constant psychological bleed
At least I rang scrap metal men who'll bring
Someone round soon, though it'll be real shite
Carrying heavy white goods to be cleared
Doing my back in, that's the latest thing

4277 - Face off

A mad day, feeling fed up, tbh
Won't go into detail, but far from good
More shit tomorrow, mental gbh
I'd retire now if I could just afford
If I didn't have to maintain my kid
But it's never about me, never was
Maybe it was symbolic, facial bleed
The scabs are falling off now from my face
But mental ones are growing to replace
Them. Don't see a point, it's all so much waste
I've given it all a good go, but my mood
Is low. Just got to find a tranquil place
In my mind, wait for France, not for the French
If I was a tramp, who would give me food

4276 - Two beer or not two beer

Had lots of queries at work 'bout my face
Looking a bit bashed in, to say the least
I told them true, delivery at pace
Of face onto road, on the way home, pissed
On Saturday evening, oh what a waste
Of my perfect skin, some song titles here
I hope you musos out there have noticed
But it's quite cool, I think, to drink much beer
Even if you become a sozzled wee-er
The weather was hot, left coat at my place
Regretted it later because it pissed
Down, but borrowed a woman's umbrella
It got me home and dry. I had a taste
Of beer tonight but only two pints, mates!!

4275 - Uke otter be kidding me

Bit of a disturbed night, noise from next door
Around 2.30 moving furniture
And walking round in loud shoes on the floor
Not very thoughtful. Today's been sunny, sure
But I'm already tanned, so stayed indoors
Made quite good use of time, deciding what
I should do at Tribeca, Sunday, for
That high pressure little 5 minute slot
Rewrote some song lyrics and even put
The melodies down on voice recorder
This evening, practised uke nearly three hours
Tried jamming to Miles Davis - it was not
As hard as you might think! Now not much more
To do, might read The Guardian 'fore I snore

4274 - Red right hand (and left)

Another sunny Bank Holiday week
End, Sunday now, met P and J in town
Ate at  Slice, a calzone magnifique
Mozzarella, mushrooms, and it went down
Nicely, with a G and T. Nice and brown
Now after two days of sunshine on skin
But I was sore after falling to ground
Last night near Regent Road after drinking
Far too much in the heat, and not eating
Pearl scrubbed my wounds with a wipe, her technique
Hurting me, but necessary - the wounds
Had dirt in them, and so needed cleaning
My daughter looked after this old antique
Even though she publicly made me moan!

4273 - On the road (literally)

Whew! That's going down as one of the classics!
A hot sunny day, pub crawl in Cheshire
By train, station to station, in the sticks
But (apart from Crewe), wealthy area
Some impressive cars seen parked here and there
Open-top sports cars drove by small bald men
Beautiful green farmland and some great beer
I thought the host was an old mate but then
After a while talking, a point came when
I realised it wasn't him, he just looks
And sounds like him. Lol. But me and him were
The last to leave in Wilmslow after ten
Walking home, fell on a main road, minute
Before I could get up - but I'm still here!

Sat 5 May

4272 - Settle down!

I'm knackered now, a busy day, and then
Home for a mad uke session and some beer
I really pushed it, now I only yawn
Will have an early night, get my head clear
Am flushing out the beer now with water
Tomorrow it's a pub crawl, visiting
Various towns in the beauty of Cheshire
Helen might join me, we will be drinking
In the sunshine at the height of the spring
Some people are partying, though they seem
To be quieting down now, it would appear
I did exercises two weeks running
Three days a week, trying to build up my strength
Now I'm settling down as night time draws near

4271 - Lily the punk

A busy day, then home to uke of course
Played Island compilation, tracks I knew
And some I didn't, it lasted 3 hours
Helen messaged, said she was listening to
My reggae vinyl stuff, and liked it too
So much excitement from such little things
Looking forward to the weekend in Crewe
Hope she can come along for a few drinks
Stopping at railway stations while heading
Back to Wilmslow, tasting brewery flowers
Cheshire country, good company, skies blue
A perfect way to celebrate the spring
And more besides as the long weekend goes
Drinking tea now, relaxing, like you do

4270 - Play yer uke better

Listening to the football while I type this
Liverpool away to Roma, semi-
Final of the Champions League. Barring did-
aster, Liverpool will go through, surely
I'm addicted to playing uke. At the
Office, I couldn't wait to get it out
Unorthodox combo of ELP
And The Fall - played Industrial Estate
Repetition, Totally Wired (that's great
To play along to), Mr Pharmacist
No Bulbs, Victoria, oh, and Fiery
Jack. Eat Y'self Fitter chugs at a rate
Funny to play all these old favourites
Heard on the Peel Show back in the 80s

4269 - Stop the whirl, I want to get off

Oh dear, my head's in a whirl, but I did
Well to go out and come back not too pissed
A nap after work helped, woke up and slid
My hands on my uke to prog, then I list
To early ELO, well Oasis
Didn't rip off the Beatles quite that much
Had mackerel, it was good, then trammed to Dids
For a pub quiz, no win, but not lost touch
That last round was the killer. Couldn't clutch
The beer vouchers this time, someone tell Sid
To collect them while I go home, we missed
Out. Knocking back the water now, it's such
A change, it's weird but good, keeping a lid
On it for now, tonight no drunken mist