4421 - September songs

It was weird watching Putin hand the cup
To Lewis Hamilton at the Grand Prix
He looked a bit stiff and old there, stood up
On the platform. Dressing room seemed to be
Awkward as Putin stood there, and when he
Had to stand for the British anthem when
We all have heard of the controversy
Of the Salisbury poisoning. Poor Putin!
Meanwhile today, did a lot of cleaning
And so did Chan, well done to her. A top
Uke session. Found lyrics to George Formby
And other songs, though didn't practice them
Need a shower to wash my tattoos, then flop
Into bed. Aim to get to work early!

4420 - Who knows what next week may bring?

Interrupted night's sleep, maybe that's why
I'm a bit tired now, at only half six
Played a mean uke this morning though, played my
French tracks, then some classic tunes by Traffic
Don't feel like doing much, maybe I'll stick
On that new Alex Harvey CD and
Get some beer in, or maybe wine, and sticks
Of white. I shouldn't, but what else to hand?
I feel it's too late now to try to plan
A Leicester Festival show. That's cos I
Had to devote three days to trying to trick
An interview panel to think this man
Is fit for our job. That's just irony
Of course I am. Pick me, I'm terrific!

4419 - She's leaving home

A drink after work with Pearl. As usual
Her life's not smooth, Luca is not in touch
As often as she'd like, he doesn't call
She's moving to Italy, should be such
An exciting time, but she's forced to clutch
At straws of hope amongst trepidation
At his reticence. Time will tell how much
He cares and whether she is his woman
Finished yesterday's wine now, and I am
Frankly quite tired now, I'm ready to fall
Into bed, why stay up late? Things can catch
Up with you, rest and recuperation
Is what I need. Tomorrow might see Pearl
Again as I hang with Jo and have lunch

4418 - Ich bin ein pisshead

I did my interview, hope it went well
It seemed to, but you really never know
It's really too soon yet to really tell
It's like there is a hundred types of snow
What is, is. Anyway, in my suit, though
Not wise, I went for a drink with Helen
Then another and another, oh no
She got pissed, mustn't happen in Berlin
That soon, or where will we be? Where's the fun?
Great plans for dressing up supping cocktail
At Alchemist, revived my spirits, so
We went to King's Arms, but Helen was done
It's always great hanging out with Hell's Bells
Got my suit off now, bottle of wine, go!

4417 - The longest day since D-Day

A very long day preparing for my
Promotion interview tomorrow, 10:30
I was in the office long after the sky
Went dark, just working on competency
Numbers one to four, and then finally
A 20 minute slide presentation
I emailed off to those who'll need to see
It and display on their television
So I can prove my communication
Skills. Ten past ten it was by the time I
Completed it and sent it off, Very
Helpful tips from the lovely Marion
Taking time out to advise how to be
Succinct and to the point. Almost ready...

4416 - And I had some new tattoos!

Worked at home, though must admit I delayed
Doing some chores and even exercise
And tried returning my boots, but they said
It wasn't a manufacturer's fault, was
Wear and tear, and merely loss of colours
And I should apply black marker pen to
Restore the black look! Hope this isn't lies
To fob me off! I don't wanna buy new
Ones anyway, so might work out fine. Two
Days to interview. Tomorrow must be made
The most of, answers ready, and the slides
Of my presentation done, stuck like glue
To my mind. There's no time to be afraid
The goal is to have a happy surprise!!

4415 - Work your socks off, baby

Listening to George Formby (second CD
Of a 3 CD set) despite tiredness
I got six hours' sleep, not enough for me
Then worked from 7:30 through to, yes
Six in the evening. My soul you must bless!
I'd have left sooner, but, what a surprise!
I got an interview. It's in three days
So gotta work my socks off, learn my lines
But also in that time I must devise
A 20 minute presentation, be
A great communicator, must impress
The panel, if to the next grade I'll rise
It's scary, but no time to be scared, see
So tomorrow, I'll work at home on this!

4414 - So much art, so little time

Urgghh. Not much sleep, tried to lie-in but it
Didn't work. So much to do, like Leicester
Festival application. Feel like shit
Then, I wanted to work on songs. Oh yeah,
Like that'll be good won't it. My mind's bare
Of energy, my body's fuckin' fucked
Which one's Gordon Brown, which one's Tony Blair?
I probably couldn't tell you if I looked
But these tasks today, they cannot be ducked
It's already 2pm, goddammit
I've done washing, recycling, but nowhere
Yet with the important stuff. I've just mucked
About reading Guardian comments. I'll eat
Lunch soon no doubt to delay things further...

4413 - Train in pain

Been out with Josie to watch United
At Old Trafford against Wolves, and Fergie
Returned after his brain op, they all stood
And applauded, although we couldn't see
Him from where we were. One-all draw. Next we
Walked to the Salford Quays mall for a drink
Jo had a nightmare return home journey
Train delayed nearly an hour, then filling
To bursting point, people even climbing
Onto tables and even overhead
Racks meant for bags. For Jo, alone, scary
Her mum met her, but she had been waiting
And worrying a good while til she did
See Josie finally arrive back safely

4412 - Grub and pub

I'm a day late with this one - it's Friday
Again, one day ago, no time to write
Til now, and also too drunk, I might say
It was Sonia's birthday bash. Went to eat
At La Vinya Spanish place on Deansgate
Had wine there and three tapas, a good price
After that, went to The Bridge, stayed til late
Had fun with Helen, Sonia and the guys
Naming songs, singing along, was real nice
After all left, it was me and Steve K
I seemed to have no trouble with my pint
But, though as is traditional my prize
Once home, was more beer, my mouth wouldn't obey
Could only drink half a can. Return, slight

4411 - All in vein

Hello, here we are, it's late Thursday night
Been out with Helen and despite the rain
We enjoyed it, starting with one or two pints
At The Vine, then Turtle Bay, and then on
To Jimmy's, Newton Street, poetry pain
And pleasure, young crowd, and Gerry Potter
I'm pleased to say my efforts weren't in vain
I hit them with three sonnets, got laughter
They didn't know I'd been to Edinburgh
And survived the comedy tightrope, tight
More than this, this wasn't scary, my veins
Were more interested in boozing than the
Conventions of whatever these folks might
Expect, and I did OK. Can't explain....

4410 - Poetry of life

A busy evening, think I need to chill
Think I'll pop out soon and get me some booze
Chan's a bit of a boozer, a bottle
Of white wine in the kitchen, partly used
And previously, beer bottles were produced
That's good, I'll feel less guilty when I get
A bit drunk myself with little excuse
Except I want to, and my mind's got set
On that objective. After this is writ
I must first rehearse poetry, or a fool
I'll look tomorrow onstage at Jimmy's
At 'Speak' spoken word night. Need to time it
So that I don't overrun. Sonnets will
Appeal, I hope, three, which I'll introduce

4409 - Snap, crackle and shop

Disturbed night, lie-in, arrived late at my
Workplace, fairly busy, had to stay late
But despite that, went out shopping, to buy
A new shower rail, some boots, and a t-shirt
Wanted something new for Berlin. I might
Buy more after payday. Put the shower rail
Up, it was tricky, hope I got it right
It's up for now, but my efforts can fail
When trying to do what DIY entails
I think Chan must be too nervous to try
She popped out, probably for a shower at eight
At the JD Gym. Saves on water bills!
Played uke to some new stuff quite capably
Last task now, rehearse poems for Thursday night...

4408 - The milk of human blindness

Just been rooting through old poems, sonnets
In congested ring-binders, days of old
When to type and print out your latest thoughts
Seemed modern. How quaint! Paper, you can fold
And even post it! Postman in the cold
Like the milkman or coal-deliverer
You are all spectres from an age not gold
I was a paper-boy, pushed newspaper
Through letter-box. A box made for letter,
Birthday and Christmas card, or wrapped presents
In jiffy bags and parcels bright and bold
People posed in costly animal fur
Their jewels on show, doorway of The Ritz
Riches - the dream with which we're all beguiled

4407 - Flat (no longer) broke

Yesterday's sonnet was written while drunk
That's why it's meaningless mumbo jumbo
The blood gets excited, brain's in a funk
Senses weakened, disruption of thought's flow
Today however, before seeing Jo
The odd job man who lives nearby, he rang
To say he was coming. I'd asked him so
Various things could be screwed in tight or banged
In place. The bathroom door had to be slammed
Shut, now it's quiet, no more that nasty clunk
Disturbing whoever's asleep. Chan's woe
Is over now, she's got a bolt to swing
Into place to keep me out! New shelf hung
In the kitchen. The cost? Just ten quid's dough!

4406 - Now is the time...

Today, you say, it's now, not yesterday
That's true, but who cares, today is today
What does it matter, what does it mean, hey?
Today's the same as yesterday, and they
Can't distinguish between then and now, way
Wide of the mark, it's meaningless. They say
Now's all there is, that's right, but in its way
The present's momentary, time at play
Best abandon it's tyranny, obey
Your instinct, know what's true, ignore what they
Try to oppress you with, live for each day
Each hour, each minute, precious, come what may
Not much else to say, Hamlet's play, swordplay
Pyrrhic victory, logic we will slay

4405 - Tattoos - hurts so good

This is yesterday, now today is here
What happened yesterday? it's cold and wet
Went for a lunchtime drink with Helen, beer
And chips in my case, in hers, chips, she ate
A falafel veggie thing, and then yet
We then had to go back to work right then
Having popped in to the tattoo place, set
An appointment to get some new design
Of multi-lingual text on my back when
I can, in just over a week. I'd feared
Too long had gone by and they had forgot
The previous times I'd been there, but hen when
We stood there, they remembered, so that fear
Was unfounded. More tattoos soon I'll get!

4404 - Having not yet read the book

Can't be arsed doing much now, but I could watch
A DVD of Superfly I bought
On Sunday, but I must start soon to catch
It all, allowing me an early night
Watching a film now I don't care about
So when I'm done writing this, I may read
Still re-reading Lady Chatterley. Ought
To crack on and finish it with all speed
Today we were wondering where we should feed
For our Christmas meal. Christmas food is such
Shit normally, turkey slices, some sort
Of winter vegetables, so I need
To try to pick somewhere less of a bitch
But persuading people's harder than thought...

4403 - Loud but they shouldn't be proud

Really knackered now, after late night drink
Last night, when back from the King's Arms, although
I wasn't so very late retiring
I kept having to re-visit the loo
Time and again, delaying sleep for too
Long, considering the previous night I had
Been disturbed by loud voices who showed no
Consideration for their neighbours. Weird
How people can be like that, really hard
To understand. How can people not think
We all should be thoughtful, not just a few?
Jo messaged me this evening, asking would
It be possible to go travelling
Soon to London? Train tickets bought. Let's go!

4402 - It still noh funny

I've got blue hair tonight, matching my shirt
I'll wash it off in the morning, I hope
I remember! Or else my name is dirt
In the office! I'll look like a right dope
More ridiculous even than the Pope
My comedy was a bit dull tonight
But who cares, at least it wasn't old rope
And I was tired, and had a beer, bit tight
There are many worse than that kinds of plight
OJ was headlining again, he's shite
At least people don't see me like that, nope
Now I'm having a beer quite late at night
Chan's in, but I only heard her, no sight
Gets up at 4:15 … I couldn't cope!

4401 - Sit up and boogie

Got home, did exercises, including
An increase in sit-ups from 30 to
50, half-sit-ups, if I'm honest. Being
Careful with my back, I mustn't put too
Much pressure on it and cause damage through
Over-enthusiasm. While shaving
In the bathroom, I heard Chan emerge, who
Finally moved in today, on returning
From seeing her sister in New Jersey, in
The States. Not surprisingly, she's sleeping
So I'm trying to be quiet. Some new
Comedy stuff jotted down, ad libbing
But on ideas that I've been preserving
On post-it notes sticky, of yellow hue

4400 - Walking in rhythm

All weekend spent listening to music, now
I've put my chosen tracks on my player
Can't wait to hear it all soon, as I go
Walking around the streets of Manchester
As I learn to play it, I'll get better
Popped out with Jo for lunch - we ate so much
She had steak, I had a big breakfast. Where?
Beastro in Spinningfields. A real big lunch
But we still wanted dessert, so we crunched
The pavements til we came to Black Milk. Wow -
Tasty cakes n shakes, full as we could bear
After many hours, I feel I could munch
Once more, got a big bag of nuts, you know
Tomorrow, I think, is the day Chan's here!!

4399 - Spain in the arse

A day in which I have done little else
But listen to music, all classical
Stuff I've not heard in years, I speak not false
Looking for a change in what I hear all
The time as I walk around. It's a thrill
To learn some new tracks I can play along
To, finding stuff that is more difficult
Is the aim, keep forward momentum strong
Played uke well today, hammered every string
But Spotify tracks for a change, it feels
Fresher than playing my MP3, usual
Tracks I know so well. Now for football. Eng-
land are being outplayed by Spain, so all's
Back to normal then - we're crap at football!

4398 - Jazzper Carrott

Listening to Handel's Water Music now
As I type this, and it's most relaxing
Lots to do, wrote a list for tomorrow
Not going out, except for food shopping
Too much to do, and must curb my spending
In any case, tomorrow looks rainy
And I can work hard, then watch football in
The evening, if it's on. Oh lucky me!
My uke playing's improving gradually
I'll probably add some Handel, get to know
It better after repeat listening
There's new jazz tracks and some miscellany
New musical challenges, some highbrow
Stuff to replace the pop and easy things

4397 - The doors of disruption

Disturbed night, next door woman's a night owl
Banging and crashing, throwing things down and
Slamming doors at all hours, disturbed my cool
In addition, some student types around
The far side of the grass made crazy sounds
Singing Bohemian Rhapsody at one
In the morning, and that wasn't all. Zounds!
Despite my tiredness, it was kinda fun
But next door made more bangs, throwing things down
At 5:20 and again around seven
So I got up, knowing that it was all-
Important that I made the train at nine
To Birmingham with the work crew. Now soul,
No, funk, I'm listening to now - George Clinton...

4396 - Bummer in the summer

According to Debs the caretaker gal
The gangster man's gone, not his missus or
Young son, so while the son's been on his hol
She's been havin' it off big style galore
Mainly at night, the bedsprings almost tore
Through my wall, any night you care to name
But now the son's due back so I feel sure
Those fine and dandy randy nights, that flame
Of hers, his thund'rous plundering of that dame
Must be approaching its climactic tale
One last time, least til Christmas or Easter
Best to end things before passion goes lame
Anyway, all's for the best, gal and pal
Here comes the autumn, let shriek turn to snore

4395 - Real gangster time

Woke at 4 a.m. and then heard next door
This time it wasn't repeat rampant sex
That was the source of noise, no, it was more
Just moving things around sound side effects
Between 4 and 5, and though he relaxed
After that, I got no more winks, even
Blinks, methinks. And I still don't know the facts
But I think it's still the gangster husband
With some new bird, no more the wife and son
I'll ask Debs, who I need to speak to for
An odd-job man recommendation. Let's
Fast forward to lunch, with smashing Helen
Talkin' bout Berlin. Not long now before
We go. Listening to Wes and Lee, jazz axe

4394 - Bedquake - disaster movie

Listening to jazz as I type this sonnet
Been out for tea at the Cote Brasserie
With Josephine who's back from Lanzarot
With a great tan and looking real healthy
At least they'll see she's been on holiday
When she goes back to school this week and meets
Her friends again. I'm so tired. Last night they
Were back and at it again 'tween the sheets
On the stroke of midnight they came, complete
Satisfaction, from the noise, you'd have thought
But then, forty-five minutes after three
Bedsprings in earthquake mode, repeat, repeat
And once again at six, more sex, dammit
So I've got beer in, oblivion the key

4393 - The sleep of the pissed

Many hours' sleep, bed at quarter to ten
The earliest I can recently recall
No chance of watching Match of the Day when
I was too pissed to stay and watch football
Two bottles of beer, and one of wine, all
Poured down with alacrity before dark
When darkness came I was done, done for, fell
Gladly into bed, heard the radio talk
For a few minutes at most, then a stark
Lights out of the mind, consciousness regained
Now and then, especially as daylight called
Another day of shopping, what a lark!
Bought and put up a new shower curtain
New sheets, and also new large and small towels

4392 - Shop til you drop (payday mayday mix)

Listenin' to Funkadelic while watchin'
The football scores, havin' been out shoppin'
To keep maraudin' flies away, new bin
A shelf for the kitchen wall for cookin'
For two, for ingredients, ready for Chan
Got a reduced price big new black fryin' pan
Nearly bought a wok too but I'm goin'
Out again tomorrow, when I'm buyin'
Among other things, a new shower curtain
Bought a new whisk, new microwave. Cookin'
Will be easier for us both, and savin'
Money on not needin' to use oven
To celebrate, I've got beer and wine in
That's enough for today, I'm relaxin'