3788 - Get Ready

It's New Year's Eve again, I'm not going out
I usually stay in then, this year's the same
Done a little comedy work, but should
Do more tomorrow. Apathy to blame?
Maybe, but went shopping, bought new clothes home
A nice new jumper and three pairs of socks
Posted Pearl's birthday card, and once again
Had fun messaging Jenny while I watched
Thunderbirds Are Go, with snakes made of rocks
Other than that, began reading the art
Book bought in Krakow, going by the name
'The Artist's Body'. On the starting blocks
For the end of '16 and then the start
Of '17, and God knows what's to come...!

3787 - Tea for two

An easy day at work chatted with Mark
Sonia and Cesar, good fun, not much done
Although I went through all emails and worked
Through them, answering difficult questions
I've just realised that I have forgotten
Pearl's birthday card, must go out now and buy
One from Sainsburys, but posting it - when?
I must go out now and get one, no lie
Maybe also some beer. Carla's home. I
Had tea with her - salami - pulled the cork
On a bottle of Prosecco. Great fun
Told her about Jenny. Now she must try
To wind down before tomorrow's hard work
At Caffe Nero. I feel like a strum!

3786 - Memoirs and maybes

Last night was mainly spent in messaging
Jenny, drinking and smoking, but I did
Play some uke before Jenny came texting
Might message her later, but I still need
To finish this sonnet. Finished my read
Of 'Memoirs of a Geisha' - next up, it's
'The Artist's Body' - costly but agreed
A worthy spend in Krakow of Polish
Zlotys unspent, with lots of sexy pix
Might re-read 'Fetish' soon, a book dating
From the nineties, might give ideas that would
Be fun to try soon with that Midland minx
It may not last but I'm up for a fling
And doing things to make us flip our lids

3785 - Home Alone

A nice day off, shopped, washed clothes, etc
In time to watch Hound of the Baskervilles
A classic '59 Hammer Horror
Now it's Father of the Bride on the tells
(Television, dummy). Might watch more films
The post-Christmas days are the best time to
Watch stuff you've never seen. Relaxing thrills
A culture catch-up, music / news review
These are also on TV now for you
In a constant stream at this time of year
Moneywise, I've paid all the Christmas bills
Even been to Poland this month (Krakow)
Even given Pearl birthday money for
Next month, but there's two hundred quid left, still!

3784 - Xmas at Mum's 4

Dozed fairly late, then had mum's cooked breakfast
Whatever it's like, that's always the best
Soon after, another walk with Robin
He drove to Hoylake, it's a position
Between West Kirby and New Brighton where
We walked yesterday, Wirral peninsula
Much milder, almost no wind, climate change
Evidence maybe - it just seems so strange
To be so mild in late December here
At the seaside where wind and cold should smear
The brave walkers with elemental pain
But none of that, dogs and humans conjoined
For harmless fun walks on the sand and prom
Best enjoy it, I guess, before it's gone

3783 - Xmas at Mum's 3

A pleasant sunny cold day, took a walk
With Robin, along the prom, by the sea
In New Brighton and Egremont, and talked
And we even took the odd joint selfie
Came back for lunch, repeat of yesterday
Food-wise - sprouts, broccoli, pots and turkey
Football took up two hours, but no Derby
Or Liverpool games to follow today
More TV, then a Chinese takeaway
Followed by remains of the trifle. Looked
At Coronation Street, and then enjoyed
Bob Monkhouse and Mike Yarwood as they lurched
Towards the end, then watched The Good Old Days
From '59, then watched Match of the Day

Mon 26 December

3782 - Xmas at Mum's 2

Christmas Day at Mum's - Robin is here too
Had a nice relaxing time, feel quite full
But not uncomfortable. Messages through
The dayfrom Jenny - dating possible
But there's a big age gap, impossible
To deny, so I didn't try, I gave
My age of 53 to a young girl
Of 34, that's probably killed her love
But no other option - I couldn't save
The situation. Nothing I could do
Maybe my love-life has just hit a wall
But if so, I don't feel I have to prove
Anything anymore, just drink some brew
She's still messaging, so I'll say Good Yule!

Sun 25 December

3781 - Xmas at Mum's 1

A confused morning, just getting ready
Packing my bag, watching Jeremy Kyle
Previous night's drinking wine made unsteady
And slow, but eventually walked the mile
To Piccadilly, then Lime Street, in style
In my new brown leather jacket, yes sir
Keeps me warm, but no hood. Rain would be vile
But it stayed dry, Merseyrail, bus journey
Birkenhead Park, through Upton, to Greasby
Got off the bus, a Chinese takeaway
Was right there, fish and chips, brought home a pile
For me and Mum. Got message from Jenny
A girl I met on Thursday, she likes me
Good chat with Mum, read at bedtime. Good Yule!

Sat 24 December

3780 - Festive restorative

A lovely family Christmas day, oh yes
P was a little feisty there at first
But in the end all was fun and less stress
Despite Storm Barbara, the meal was the best
The Laundrette was great, Irish coffee thirst-
Quencher for me. P and J went shopping
Me, V and L caught tram back, then a burst
Of comedy discussion, then returning
Girls, followed by lively board game playing
The usual loud levels, egg nog success
Made by P, J had some and liked it! Cursed
Day not, then took J home by taxi-ing
Carla meanwhile's back home in near Venice
Loving the proper food, full fit to burst!

3779 - The wonder of you

I waited til the evening was over
Before doing this sonnet, glad I did
Because I can now say how it went, the
Tedium, wonder how to describe it
People are dull, but still me and Richard
Agreed on Stevie Wonder albums, and
That Innervisions was his best, still good
Stuff was found on Talking Book, but the grand
Stuff was after that, not the poppy sound
Of Songs In The Key Of Life, popular
Though that was, we'd best focus on the mid-
Career funky synth stuff, you wanna dance
But also think, that's what you get, Inner
Visions is the best album, we agreed

3778 - The gift

Whew! What a high-achievement evening - I
Have got home, exercised, and wrapped presents
Eaten some pasta, chick peas and a pie
Caught up with news, chatted to Carla, sensed
I could wrap her gift as she slept - success -
She emerged just afterwards, saw it wrapped
She said that looks so nice, and I said yes -
It's for you! She was so pleased, almost clapped
We hugged, I wished her Merry Christmas, chat
Followed as she cooked. Postponed our drink. She flies
To Italy on Christmas Eve, but dense
Diaries this time of year meant a new pact -
We'll go out on the 30th, that's Friday -
New Year's Eve Eve - that meal will be pleasant!

3777 - You go to my head

Preparing for tonight's comedy show
At the King's Arms, there's still plenty of time
As I did yesterday, managed to go
Home early from work, and I felt so fine
Last night, I wrote new stuff, a few new lines
Of comedy and song lyric, not bad
I started rehearsing it then, my mind
Going over it, getting it in my head
Reasonably well-learned when I went to bed
As for tonight, I've eaten, and I know
The song words quite well. Just need to refine
My chord-playing, a chore often deferred
If I mess up, it's not too bad a blow
But application, that's success defined

3776 - Back in the old routine

Good sleep, woke fairly early, worked full day
But able to leave around four fifteen
Enabling me to do a lot - did the
Exercise routine back home, then writing
Comedy set for tomorrow evening
The Christmas Party at King's Arms, Salford
After that, good uke and guitar playing
To Bowie, New Order and to Leonard
Cohen, plus Bryan Ferry - not as hard
As it once was, but it's still more easy
At home than onstage, and that's not changing
So practice more and more, get the reward
Then I learned my lyrics of comedy
Should eat, but drinking the wine that I won!

3775 - Friends in the end

A nice day not doing nothing but not hard
Work either, just arranging a few things
Over the approaching Christmas period
It's been a nice snug day, with the heating
On the whole time, mine and Carla's washing
Both done. Where has today gone? I'm not sure
I feel guilty, but I am punishing
Myself a little, maybe. Jokes galore?
No, nothing new written, it makes me sore
But I've asked for two gigs, and my reward
Is I've got one at least. Also eating
Out next Thursday night, Meet-Up friends once more
Should be fun. I am fairly rarely bored
These days, I feel focused and emerging!

3774 - Absence makes the heart grow fonder

A nice family day, both daughters seen
And Vee, the ex-missus, at her new flat
And Christmas shopping in the Arndale, done
Not much more to do now, just wrapping, that
Will then be handed out when we next meet
On Friday, at Vee's flat, then it's a meal
At that cool new restaurant, The Laundrette
I really am lucky to have these real
Lovely people in my family, we'll
Just continue to stay close and have fun
The watchword when we're together, no spats
Maybe partly because we didn't feel
We saw too much of each other, but come
Together in friendliness, there's no hate

3773 - Papa's lost his brand new bag

A good works night, lasted from twelve til ten
Or ten thirty, not sure, but home now, and
It's now nearly twelve, so that was good, then
My bag's in the office, charger, I'll sound
Out the possibilities, get my hands
On it tomorrow, on the way to see
Jo in Wilmslow, and sort out her presents
And in Manchester, buy her gifts for me
I'm quite drunk, but I've been worse, honestly
Good chats with most of them, with most of them
They are a good bunch, mostly they are sound
No, all of them, they all are, honestly
So now it's bed time, it's now midnight ten
I hope I get a good night's sleep, and, and...

3772 - Uke can be serious!

I've been mentally slow today, I guess
Because of two hard days and nights, drinking
Quite late both times. Tonight I must not stress
Or do too much. Ukulele playing
And guitar playing went well, still getting
Better, felt I'd gained from Tuesday's live show
And all the practice I'd done, preparing
Found I could play it better than before
Was bashing out rock and prog tunes, yeah, saw
A real improvement - hurray for practice!
And, to show us that Christmas is coming
Tomorrow's the office meal. So there's no
Need to eat much, but I'm starving, so let's
Put something on a plate and get eating!

3771 - Gig giggles and beer goggles

I am a bit drunk right now, if honest
After work, went with Steve to the Dockyard
That started me off on the beer, the rest
Is history... Good chat with Carla, had
To find out about last night, when she did
A gig in Liverpool. It sounds as though
In many ways it was a nightmare. Bad
As my night in Leeds, then! At least I 'd go
Quite well into my routine, but hers, no
Microphone problems, AJ Hill, he's pissed
And trying to chat her up, not saying she's bored
But she was, and anyway, it's a no
So now, I need to harness my own fist
Of fun, or pun, or anything. My word!

3770 - A hard rain did fall

It really was a day of hard work - boy!
A day off work, but no contradiction
I spent the day rehearsing, an alloy
Of constant thinking through the set and going
For long walk to get hair cut in the rain
And running through the ukulele chords
I left soon after four, a bus to gain
Got wet again, but there was more discord
Stuck in cold Shudehill bus station, a hoard
Of other let-down passengers as they
Like me, waited almost three hours for one
Or another Megabus then to board
Mine was to Leeds, so late, but gig ahoy!
Got there in nick of time and did my turn!

3769 - Work hard, laugh hard

Woke at quarter to six, and that was it
No more sleep, so now I'm pretty knackered
Must go to bed early, recharge, feel fit
For going to Leeds with my comedy set
Established in my mind, for full effect
I've improved the set, done a second draft
That's important, important to direct
More effort than in the past. Folks have laughed
But could laugh more. To not try hard is daft
On my part. I work hard at work. Can't split
Work and comedy that way - both are hard
If you do them well. Comedy's a craft
It can't be perfected in a minute
A moment's idea is slowly sculpted

3768 - Family entertainment

A great visit to Vee's with Louis too
He revealed his TV ideas are bearing
Fruit in London, and also, asked me to
Send him some comedy info with links
To stand-up venues - yes, he is thinking
About doing it himself, just like me
So after this sonnet I'll try sending
Him info about comedy nights he
Could possibly attend. Great to hear he
Is confident about trying the new
Rock n roll, hee hee, and I'll be helping
Him to get started! This came completely
Out of the blue! Yes, right out of the blue!
Before I get too drunk, some rehearsing!

3767 - Travis Pickle

A nice day doing nothing, just a quick
Walk to the supermarket for bog roll
Was all, oh, and wrote a new set, quite slick
For next Tuesday evening in Leeds that will
Hopefully not be as cold and wet, still
Freeze at the thought of last month's gig there, snow
Almost fell, instead, it rained on me til
I thought I was Travis. Better there, though
Where James was a good host, than that bozo
Who buggered up the audienceless Lymm gig.
If I have learned from that, then that dreadful
Night will have been worthwhile. Changing style to
Contain fewer jokes, no bad acting, stick
To being me, just like I am, poor soul

3766 - What to do?

Back at work, working hard, and chatting, too
Glad I went in and didn't take more leave
Back home, did exercises, wee'd in loo
Carla had the heat on, as you'd believe
She's turned it off now, but we'll need to leave
It on for my clothes to dry, soon. She's up
Now, after post-work rest, meant to retrieve
Energy after a long shift with cups
Of coffee for ungrateful gals and chaps
In Caffe Nero, Deansgate. Told her to
Hurry up and change jobs, so she can give
Comedy a decent shot, stay on top
And not exhaust herself. Now, what to do
Tonight? Not sure, would you Adam and Eve?

3765 - Krackers in Krakow 4

I'm home now, but I'll summarise my day
Another shit breakfast, City Hostel
In Old Krakow. I only had til 3
On this final day there, and then shuttle
By train back to the airport, Liverpool
The touchdown place. Nice walk 'cross the river
Wisla (Vistula). Schindler's factory full
It seemed, of tourist hordes, so I preferred
The Modern Art Museum choice, and, fair
Enough, I liked it. Bought a book, to pay
Out my remaining zlotys. Lunch, a Pole's
Favourite, pierogi (dumplings) - lovely fare
Simple and satisfying. Then away
Back home in no time. Poland - you did well!

3764 - Krackers in Krakow 3

Today I'd planned that I'd go to Auschwitz
Nearly forgot to book online, but did
(It was free, without a guide). Bus, small cost
Of 14 zloty, that's less than 5 quid
An hour and a half journey, the bus did
(Glad Jo wasn't there to moan!) Humbling to
See this historic, tragic site that hid
Its real-life horrors, not that long ago
They try to recreate it with photo
And lots of multi-lingual guides who crossed
My path repeatedly. Shuttle bus sped
The short distance to Birkenau, still so
Eerie, though mainly quickly demolished
As the Nazis realised they'd lost, and fled

Wed 7 Dec

3763 - Krackers in Krakow 2

Awoke in City Hostel, Old Krakow
Not too much sleep - normal on holiday
Quite a poor breakfast, but all paid for now
Headed out for the market square, where they
Answered my prayers - fridge magnets, silver tree
Postcard of Nowa Huta, warming drink
Then wandered down Grodzka, bought a hoodie
Resplendent with the Polish eagle, think
That's been my main expense. Then a quick fling
Up Wawel Hill (cathedral, castle). How
Nice to see December snow fall this way!
To Kazimierz, Plac Nowy, lunch and drink
Back at hostel, a rest, rehearsed, a go
On the uke, then pub football, pints away!

Tue 6 Dec

3762 - Krackers in Krakow 1

The day has come - I'm flying to Poland
It'll be dark quite soon and I'm still here
In the flat, writing this. While there, I've planned
To look round Krakow, lightning speed, I fear
Just one full day for that, and another
Cultural must - Auschwitz - on the next day
Then there's a final half-day, and the air-
port reached for the flight back to the UK
To Liverpool on the return leg, they
Tell me at Ryanair. Promotion's sand
Has slipped through my fingers again, it's clear
People don't want me in their teams, they say
(Or think) I'm not up to it, the bell-ends -
Like they ARE. Right, I'm off into the air!

3761 - Personal Brexit

It was a crisp blue sky winter morning
Manchester city centre still quite calm
Christmas markets just about opening
As was Waterstone's bookshop, where I'd come
To look for a book on Poland, or some
Regional book on Krakow. I found that
And bought a book by Stewart Lee, who's done
Stand-up all these years, but he still fell flat
According to the book's cover. I thought
It might be a good read, but it's waiting
Til I finish a book I've just begun
'Memoirs of a Geisha.' Brexit, Brexit
I keep hearing, such a daft word, I think
Government / civil service perfect storm

3760 - Sweat the sweaty stuff

It's hot in here, I'm sweating, no bullshit
Carla's had the heat on all day but hey
She's Italian, and there's no crime in that
Besides, it's nice to be warm, yes, and dry
Michael McIntyre's Big Show's on TV
I've had a coffee, bit dehydrated
Maybe because I've not drunk much today
Also when I got home I felt quite tired
My aim's to finish this, and then to read
The last few pages of my book so it
Can be swapped for a new one, holiday
Reading, you know (in Poland). Decided
Not to brave the Crimbo crowds, so had
Brunch in Sainsburys, then Jo baked cookies - yay!

3759 - Polish opposites

Last working day before Poland is done
Carla's gone to Widnes to do a set
I hope it's not the shithole I stayed in
With Josephine, don't think it is, hope not
I've done my best to keep up with the plot
Been too busy at work for travel prep
But got my zlotys this morning, a wait
For the bureau to open, then looked up
And saw they sold Polish money - top tip -
Five zlotys to the pound, not cumbersome
Then to work out the cost of stuff once out
There. Next, tomorrow with Jo, when I shop
In Manchester, a woolly jumper's one
Mission I must quickly choose to accept

3758 - Crack on with Krakow

Oops - just realised I've not bought currency
For Poland, and I'm going next Monday
Just checked it and they still use the zloty
The euro would have been easier, cos they
Are more easily bought, and cos Friday
Is the last working day before I go
I'll need to find and buy them straight away
If this isn't possible, I'll just go
To Poland and get my cash there, it's no
Disaster. Hope the flight's faster than the
Eternal flight to Cyprus recently
I'm going on my own this time, not with Jo
Or John or anyone, but we will see
I might meet folk and have fun, anyway