Today I've stayed in but been so busy
Washed clothes, and read my new book on Israel
Wrote some ideas in that book Pearl bought me
Which already seems to inspire me well
To come up with new gag material
Heard Man United's thrashing of Leicester
Away, on 5 Live radio, meanwhile
The Foxes look dangerously close to the
Drop. I hope they do plunge down, way down there
Into the second division, only
One year after being champions. Oh well
That's what you get for hubris, Lice-ces-ter!
Shouldn't have taken those drugs, James Vardy
Now the evening's nearly gone. Effing hell!
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